I was a teacher and had just started the school year before having my daughter. I told my husband before, that if he did get this job I wanted to stay in Tampa to finish the school year. I had a responsibility to my school and I loved my job. The one downside of that was that my husband had to be up in NYC in one month. Sticking to that decision, I stayed in Tampa with my newborn daughter to finish out my teaching position, while my husband went up to NYC.
When I originally decided to stay in Tampa, I didn’t know the difficulties of parenthood. I had no clue that the first couple months are TOUGH! Why doesn’t anyone tell you the truth about the first couple months BEFORE having a baby? Not that it would have changed my decision on having one. I just think I would have gone into this a little more level headed then with rose colored glasses on. Having a baby is even tougher when you don’t have your spouse there to help you in the middle of the night to feed her or change a diaper. There is no one there to rock her back and forth during the witching hour.
In those nine months that my daughter and I lived in Tampa without my husband (he would come home on weekends when he could), I gained an enormous amount of respect for single moms and working moms. I would come home from work and immediately start to get things ready for the next day. I had to wash bottles, feed her, get her bathed, play with her, get her to bed, and at some point find some time for me to eat and take a shower.
Looking back on that time, even now that I am with my husband in NYC, I wouldn’t have changed my decision for anything. My daughter and I have an amazing relationship and I learned a lot about myself. I learned that I am capable of doing a lot more than I ever thought that I could do. I became much more independent and self sufficient. There were many tears along the way, but they were all worth it. I feel like I can do anything now! Even conquer this new city we are now living in.
Now that one adventure has ended, a new one had begun. I am now a stay at home mom trying to make it in this huge city with my daughter!
You can read about our adventures in this new city at http://www.amommyinthecity.com/
Life is all about adventures, and you just have to embrace each new one as it comes along. I am sure your husband is doing what is best for the whole family. Good luck!